My Heart - by Kristen Lea

I would say happy new year, but its not here yet... so you'll have to wait to hear that one. What's up with our branch office being the only one that doesn't get days off because of holidays? IT SUCKS! I was anticipating at least one day off! I'm excited about New Year's Eve. I usually hate new year's eve too. Michelle's having a party and it is going to be so so fun. We'll see. At midnight I'll probably still think it sucks because NYE is the loneliest night of the whole year. Ok. Peace out.

So Christmas rocked. Not only did I get some pretty cool stuff, but I had a wonderful time with my family. We had Margaritas on Christmas eve, which was AWESOME, and had a good time all around. Then on Christmas we had dinner and played the infamous card game "screw your neighbor." Gramma was sick on Christmas day, so Uncle Tim said that if she didn't get better soon, they were shipping her off to the manor home. He was joking of course. The day before Christmas Eve, I got into a fight with my sister's loser boyfriend. He was cussing her out and calling her not nice names, and I schooled him on why he shouldn't talk to her like that. He told me that I had no business telling him how to talk to his girlfriend and I informed him it was my business because she was my sister, and told him he needed to learn to treat women with respect. His mom was a whore, so he thinks all women are going to be that way. He has serious issues. When he cussed me out, I told h

Yo MONICA- here's your shout out- YOU ROCK! To answer the previous commenter's question, I have known Mr. Big for about 3 years, give or take a few months. Most recently our "hanging out" (for lack of better verbage), has been since August. Our relationship has been comparable to that of Carrie and Mr. Big from Sex and the City- besides the whole marriage thing and cheating on his wife thing- he's never been married, and therefore never cheated on his wife with me either.... However, after we first met and I went back to college, I did have a host family when I travelled with The Chorale where the host dad looked EXACTLY like him and shared his (real) name. I'd like to give a shout out to Monica. See dear, there's another one. I'm stocking up. I'm excited about Christmas. Yeah, I may be broke, and I may be living back at home for a short time, but I love Christmas. I love spending the holidays with my family... no matter how crazy they are.

First of all, in response to Monica's comment, No, I don't have any pictures of Big and me to post. Read November 26ths entry about the big secret of his identity explanation. Its still the same. Anyone who wants a description, feel free to ask. There may be people reading this who don't know who he is yet for a reason. Sorry, Monica.

So, is anyone else annoyed that postage is going up again? I mean, I know that 2 cents should not seem like a lot, but it adds up fast. How much do we really need to raise the stamps up to 39 cents? And for that matter, why not at that point at least make it a round number so its easier to add up in your head? At least THAT would make sense to me. No wonder those people go postal. Anyway, I'm a bit irritated. In the past few weeks, our boss said that if we weren't at a certain level of production by Christmas, we'd have to work the day after Christmas. Perhaps I didnt quite understand what he was getting at, but now the deal is that if we're not at a certain level of production at the end of this week, then we have to come in Friday.... you know, Christmas Eve Eve. It wouldn't bother me so much if I had known about it, and if I've had a bit better month (obviously) So I need to make about 700 dollars in the next two days, which is entirely possible, but I

Does anyone really read this thing? If you do, leave a comment. Then you'll for sure get a "shout out." Yeah, I'm ghetto now.

So, yeah. I have no idea what to write. Hmmm... The weather around here sucks. I'm sick of driving around in this crap... however, I do like the fact that we will have a white Christmas, and I don't mind winter in general, I just hate the fact that I have to drive around on the crappy roads all the time. AND another thing: What is the deal with gas prices going up 20 cents in one day! That is just outrageous. Perhaps I shouldn't be complaining, since the prices are less now than they were this summer, and as Americans, we are finally paying prices comparable to the rest of the world, but 20 cents in one day?! IN ONE DAY?! Lets see, there are about 9 days until Christmas and I have 1.) Not sent out Christmas cards, which makes me believe I won't; and 2.) Not purchased any sorts of gifts for anyone. I'm not normally that bad of a procrastinator, but this year the story is different. I get paid on commission and because a situation I can't really explain b

So yeah, Yesterday sucked because I didn't make any money.... and some stupid dude locked my keys in my car because I stupidly let him move my car when I was at his house and then he wanted ME to pay for it. Thank goodness his wife made him pay to get my car door unlocked since it was his fault. Some people's kids!! Anyway, I'm excited because its finally time to decorate the Christmas tree. I can hardly wait!We got our tree so late this year and I just can't wait to decorate it, even though my sister never does it right.... you see, there is a correct way to decorate a tree, and an incorrect way to do it. MY way is correct, and any other way is wrong. I hope those of you reading this know me well enough to know how to take that statement. What's the deal with me writing emails to people and never hearing back from them? I mean, I'm usually horrible at keeping in contact with people, but now that I'm trying to be better at it, the other people aren'

Just so those of you reading this know, you need to take everything I say with a grain of salt, and if you don't know what that means, you're stupid. (I hope some of you can appreciate that opening line). Anywho- so Saturday was the office Christmas party, and it was awesome. I had a rockin' time, and no, Big did not attend. It didn't really bother me, because I didn't have to worry about people telling him how much I talk about him or anything like that. Not that its constantly, but he's gotten a few "shout outs" in the past few months. Its mostly just the people on my team though. I understand the stress finals can inflict on a person in college, afterall, I went through more finals in my undergrad than most do (not really sure if that's true, but I did go 5 years). However, people at the office are not always so understanding. I don't really care what they think, because I know that I don't have to be defined by whether or not Big

Well, today and the past night have been interesting... we'll go in chronological order though. Last night, after a less than mediocre day in the field, I made my way to the thursday night women's group I have been participating with at my church. Well, around 8pm or so, I got a call from my manager, Jeff. Now, Jeff was scheduled to go to meet my client's power of attorney to get this ridiculous situation taken care of that has left me without getting paid for 2 months. Now, he calls me, and I'm expecting him to tell me how he got everything taken care of and we should be expecting a check in a matter of days. Well, it was quite the opposite. He tells me that he never even got to go to meet the woman because she cancelled... then said if the product we are putting her aunt into is an annuity, she doesn't want to do it for a few reasons. Well, the door is still open to make some money, but that's not the point. The point is that I haven't gotten paid in 2 mon

So if Monica is reading this- what's up... otherwise, hi everyone that may read this thing. So here's the deal. We're having this seemingly awesome Christmas party for work, and I wanted to invite Big, but there's a new catch. Here it is: all men have to wear suits. Now, this doesn't seem like it would be a problem, but how many normal college guys have suits? I mean, for the love- if you're bringing a guest, can't there be a little bit of an exception?! Its not like he has to work here. Things are going well. Mr. Big and I spent all Saturday together. It was a good time to be had by all. At least I think so. It seemed that way. My life is going pretty well in the personal aspect these days... financially it still sucks. I haven't gotten paid in about two months. Once this whole ordeal is over, I will be so sooooo happy. Things with Big make me happy. I couldn't care less about everything else at this point. Well, we shall see what h

So Thanksgiving rocked! I had so much fun hanging with my family and what not. We had endless laughs and fun playing this card game called "screw your neighbor," then we played my dvd game "shout about movies," and that rocked too. I always have so much fun hanging out with my family, especially my uncle tim. he's so awesome. Anyway- the day before thanksgiving I called Mr. Big and all was fine... until when we were getting ready to hang up and I told him Happy thanksgiving and then he said the same to me... and it was the way he said it, and the inflection of his voice that nearly made me cry... and it was probably because I was PMSing or something, but I couldn't believe it myself. Okay, so anyway, the day after thanksgiving, i went shopping with my mom and picked up some awesome deals. No one got trampled, and i didn't end up having to punch anyone. it was kinda uneventful really. this weekend has been great... i'm so glad that i've gott

So, do you ever wonder if you made the right decision? I mean, not HUGE decisions, but seemingly small decisions that could potential make or break a situation. I sent Mr. Big a letter, just trying to clear up some misunderstandings. I hope and pray he didn't take it the wrong way. I will probably check to make sure just to be safe and "test the water" to use a stupid expression. I was going to write about something else and I forgot!! Was anyone else under the impression that once they got a little older... like into their mid twenties, that the skin problems would disappear and the main issue would now change into p0stponing wrinkles? Well, I DID! I still have skin problems, and I'm 25, so for those of you optimists that think once you're out of your teens it'll all be over... i'm sorry to be the one to have to break you the news. THAT IS NOT TRUE! Oh I remembered what else I wanted to write about now! The book "Captivating" is amazing. I highl

For those of you who actually still read this thing, sorry I haven't written in a while. I've been crazy busy. Work is going okay- still getting a little bit of a mess ironed out that's been going on for about 6 months, but hoping that all will be resolved in the next week. No- I know it will be. As for other things, My friend Emily got married (another one bites the dust) and I saw a beautiful picture of her wedding day that made me cry. Oh well... Also D-Dogg- a.k.a. Deven Cole Swan had her little hami, and her name is Katelyn. She weighed in at 8 lbs 4.8 oz. and 20 inches long on September 28, 2005. Congratulations to Deven and Stephen (friend-in-law). So for those of you who may have any idea about who I am referring, a certain guy has made a reappearance in my life. His nickname is Mr. Big, for one main reason. No- not that one! I came up with that nickname while becoming addicted to the show "Sex and the City," when I realized that our relationship

Yo to all of you who read this... if there is anyone out there. So, I talked to my friend Kandi for the first time in a very long time yesterday. It was really nice to talk to her again! I miss her and all my other IWU friends so much! So, I'm sitting here at work feeling like I should be working, but the only reason I am at the office is because someone stood me up for an appointment. But I already wrote one app. today, so I don't feel too horrible about myself. So I sent an old friend a card the other day. I haven't heard anything back yet, so I hope they haven't decided to write me off forever and never speak to me again. If so, I guess I'll get over it... maybe someday (haha- that was called sarcasm). It is so flipping hot outside lately. I never thought global warming was that big of a deal until this summer. It has been SO bloody hot! I can't even believe it. I wish I had a pool even though I live by the lake... because its hot at night too, and

Sometimes I hate people a lot, you know? Not necessarily one person in particular, just people. I've been considering reconnecting with an old friend. I'm not sure if it will be worth the effort. You know, sometimes its not worth it because it turns out that the person is going to end up treating you like a jerk like they did in the past. AND sometimes it is worth it and it makes you so happy that you can be friends with them again..... but that raises another question that often comes to my mind... can you ever really be friends with someone that you previously had feelings for in that "more than friends" kind of way? Not sure. Is there always going to be that underlying question there, as to motives, and whether you will start heading that way again in the relationship? I don't know. That's why I am afraid of attempting a reconnection with this person. Last time nothing bad happened, but it wasn't the same as it had been before. I just like whe

So I guess that I was wrong. More than one person does read my blog! Let me clarify about my financial problems: this mostly stems from the fact that I get paid on commission and even though I was top agent last month, I have not gotten paid on most of those sales. The big one was being held up by some douche who was trying to take advantage of my client. I should get paid on that by next week, but I have bills now. Anyway- I wrote another policy today... another annuity. Maybe I really am the annuity queen as they've started to call me in the office. Ha... that's funny to me. Anyway, I'm tired, and have to get up in the morning, so I'm going to bed!!!!

Yo everyone... I should say ALL one of you that read this... I'm sure there's not many more than one of my friends who reads this (Jasmine).... anyway- I am almost done stressing about money. I have my big transfer almost all taken care of. This poor lady (my client), has gone through so much to get her money to a better place, and I'll be glad when we have it all taken care of finally. The guy from the other company has been really unethical, and I'm not pleased. Anyway- I was happy to write a few small annuities today, because I need the apps. I really really want to get my 30 applications in 90 days so I can get a free laptop. That would frickin' rock. Plus I get back all the money I put into my training. I was actually Top Agent in the office last month, with my total commission being almost 15,000. By the way, for anyone who thinks I may owe them money- no I have not seen most of that money yet. ALSO- my friend charity and I put in an application to ren

So I'm very stressed out about money. If there's anyone out there that is reading this that thinks they may have any suggestions- go for it. I have all this money coming to me, but the company we are transferring it from is being gay and not sending the check and scaring my client to death about doing the transfer. I'm probably going to kill them. Anyway, I'm probably going to have to borrow money from people or something in order to pay my bills. which isn't so bad because i know i'm going to get the money in a week or so, but I LOATHE asking to borrow money. Because most people I know can't afford it in the first place.

So what a week... I know I haven't written in a long time, but I've been pretty busy with work. This week, in one sale, on my second day out on my own, I sold a 350,000 dollar annuity which means the commission on that one sale is just over 8,000 dollars. ROCK ON! I was so excited! There are no more words that can describe how I feel about that. Last weekend, me and a few friends watched all three LOTR extended version movies back to back on saturday, and it was AWESOME! I want to do it again! How much of a nerd does that make me?! I don't care who you are, those are fantastic movies. Maybe I should get back to trying to find what I've been looking for all day (no, not a man, i've been looking for that longer than just today)!!!!!!

So my first week at my new job went okay. I think I like my field trainer. He's extremely confident and even cocky, but in a good way. He's a good guy, and he knows what he's talking about. Well, besides that I didn't really do a lot this past week. I usually didn't get home until at least 7:30 or 8 pm. Then fell asleep early to go back to work... I guess I'll wait to write more about my job...

So, the Oscars turned out pretty awesome. A lot of my predictions came true. A lot of people who deserved to win actually won. So, how much of a douche is SEAN PENN?!?!?!?! He can't even take a joke. If you don't know what I'm talking about because you didn't watch, leave a comment or email me and I'll try to explain it. Lets just say for now that he takes himself way too seriously. So, today was supposed to be my first day of training at Bankers in GR, but the two others who were supposed to be training with me had things come up, so I pretty much went all the freaking way to GR for nothing. So training starts tomorrow. I can't wait to get started and used to doing my job. That will be pretty awesome. There was one pretty cute guy there but I'm pretty sure I saw a wedding ring. Argh! Suck..... that always happens. I cannot wait until spring! It will be pretty awesome! Our puppy is as fun and as devilish as ever.

So, I am irritated. I had (yes, had ) this "friend" and we did a lot of stuff together and I stayed at her house all the time... even went out of my way to stay there when she didn't have a car to drive to work, so I could take her, and because of something stupid, she's decided she is not going to talk to me anymore. Believe me, this is no skin off my back, I could really care less if she's really that immature and can't get over anything (even though there is nothing to get over)- then that's HER problem. I almost feel sorry for her because she's such a liar that no one I know believes her or really wants to be associated with her. She has (since the "incident") been telling lies about me, but I guess it doesn't really matter since no one in their right mind would believe anything she said. As my friend Josef once said, "she'd lie just for fun." He said something like that. I believe him now, because I am experienci

Today was my last insurance class. I have a lot of studying to do before Tuesday! It was overall a decent experience, besides some of the idiots who asked the most moronic questions. I went to a basketball game tonight and Lakewood kicked Dewitt's butt. SPANKED 'EM! The final score was around 68-41. The lead was never less than 10. Sadly, I could shoot better than their whole team. Our team rocked. The only reason we didn't win by more was that the refs were kinda dumb. We were on FOX 47 though, and they called Lakewood one of the best cheering sections around. That was cool! I have nothing else. I am OUT.

So today was my first session of my insurance class. It wasn't too bad, the stuff isn't that difficult... its just a lot of information. If I can pass Music History with Dr. Kindley, I can pass this test. The worst part of the test is that there are questions that don't even count, but you don't know which ones they are. So, if you get them right, it doesn't count. Pretty gay if you ask me. I think I may have made a friend already. The girl who sat next to me- her name is Katie- is really nice. She seems pretty cool and we shared a few laughs already. We will be working together at Bankers if we both pass the test! She reminds me a lot of Nicole. She was even a history/poli sci major AND was wearing pointy shoes. How about that?! Well, I should go now... CSI: Miami is on AND I need to review my notes for today!

Well, today was interesting. I found out that my alleged friend Andrea is mad at me, and telling people that she's "trying not to talk to me." I wish she could be mature enough to tell me these things. You see, she's 21 but she's pretty immature when it comes to any kind of social interaction. This is why I am her only friend. So, basically the main reason I was being her friend was because I knew her friends in the past have been unloyal or betrayed her in some way. I have not done this. I have been loyal, and the only reason she's mad at me is because she thinks I got mad at her. That's probably one of the stupidest things I've heard in a long time. Well, I think I'm going to call her and leave a voice mail. If she doesn't want to be my friend anymore, that's fine. I don't need her friendship. I have plenty of friends to go around. However, either way I do need to get my stuff back. Its really too bad, because I love her

So, today was pretty boring. All I did was go for a run, study, watch TV and crochet. I'm almost done with my blanket! I'm pretty excited. This one is the best blanket I've ever made. Too bad I just realized that my planned bedroom scheme will not really go with the blanket. Oh well, I'll find somewhere for it. I'm going to make a blanket for someone else next. Now that I have the task mastered, I can start giving them away! I mean, I've made scarves for my friends before, but that's different. They're much smaller and take about a day to make. I've been crocheting this blanket for about a year and a half (on and off). I have a long, probably boring weekend ahead of me. I'm going to be studying for that insurance class that begins bright and early at 8 AM on stupid Valentine's day. Ugh- I am not looking forward to that day. Every year I pray to God that it will be my last year alone without my Valentine. Then, for once, I would

So I pretty much am sick and tired of Valentine's day already and it hasn't even gotten here yet. I loathe Valentine's day, and I don't think I've ever had a good Valentine's day in my entire life. The one time I was dating someone during Valentine's day, I got a plant. He said he got me the plant because "flowers die, and I wanted to get you something living for your room." It died within the next week. When I told him, he said (and I quote), "It was just a cheap walmart plant." I could have punched him in the throat. Oh well, the important thing is that I didn't, right? Sometimes I wish... I friggin' hate valentine's day. Its also known as "Single Awareness Day" to those of us who don't have some sort of admirer. I wish I even had some admirer like I used to have at walmart- Imbred ugly and disgusting. At least it'd be something. Ha! Some guy that we think was probably missing a few brain cells

So, basically I wake up every day thanking GOD that I don't work at walmart anymore. Next week my fun and exciting class for me to get my insurance license starts. I'm sure that will be an interesting week of driving all the out to GR just to go to class from 8 AM to 5 PM! Ugh! Someone tried to talk me into going onto eharmony.com and doing some profile crap cuz she met a boyfriend there, and I filled out all the stuff, but in order to communicate with ANY of your matches you have to pay at least fifty dollars. How gay. The guy on the commercials acts like he really cares about helping people find real love when all he really cares about it making the cash. What a hoser. Ahh... I'm sure I'll write more later, but remember, if you have any constructive criticism or something else to say, leave a comment! You're more than welcome.

So, today is Ash Wednesday.... I'm giving up sweets again for Lent. My sweets, I mean dessert type foods, and candies, and stuff like that. Not Soda! Last year I was mocked because I drank soda while giving up "sweets." I'm sorry, but I can't do it all at once! So, I may be FINALLY getting my car fixed next week. I hope I hope I hope. I can't wait to get it fixed, it will make me feel so much better. I bought and watched "The Notebook" today. I read the book first, as I believe I wrote about, and the movie is just as good as the book, although they did change a few things. I know they always change stuff, and I'm not complaining, because it didn't change the integrity of the story. If you haven't seen it or read the book, I highly recommend doing one or the other, OR BOTH! Isn't it weird that sometimes you don't see someone for the longest time, and then you dream of them? Or even if you just start thinking of

I had choir practice tonight. I am always amazed when people tell me that they like my voice (or other various comliments they give me about my voice), because it has been crappy because I haven't been practicing as much as I should. Apparently its at least still up to par. Oh well. Practice was good. We have our first concert coming up in a few weeks, and I can't wait! Anyway- I did that, studied for the stupid insurance test (which I'm getting rather sick of, by the way) and ran today. Yeah, I did it... its true. I'm getting in the habit. It was really foggy though. Anyway- my sister wants to be killed so I have to go. The world does revolve around her after all. I want to punch her in the throat. Ugh.

So, tonight I saw "Million Dollar Baby." Wow, talk about surprising. It wasn't really anything that I thought it would be. I'm pretty sure Hillary Swank will win the Oscar. It was amazing. I highly recommend that you see it. It was amazing! Thats all I really wanted to write tonight... SNL is on, I'm out!

So I started running (and walking) yesterday. It hurts. Yeah. I had been for a while back when I lived in the apartment, but my schedule or the weather did not cooperate. So now that its been nice outside, I decided that I should do it again. My legs and abs ache a bit. Oh well. I'll get over it for real. So I did something completely stupid. A girl I used to work with told me she has a boyfriend now because of eharmony.com... so what do I do- go there and fill out one of those personality profliles. Just for kicks, not thinking of it seriously, because I always think of people that go on those sites are just desperate. I just wanted to see what it was like. It was LONG! Ever looked up your ex or someone you like on www.whitepages.com ? Well, I have. Pathetic. Oh well. That's all for now.

So I have basically been studying insurance crap this whole week. Its a lot of information, but its pretty easy stuff so far. I've officially kept 50 pages of notes. So, yeah, I'm so excited about the possibility of all this money that I could be making and the possibility of getting my own place and being completely independent and being able to decorate it! Also, eventually I'd love to buy my gramma's old house. The people that bought it are douche bags, and they got this amazing house for dirt cheap, so I really want to buy it back and make it my very own. I have so many plans, and I haven't even gotten my insurance license yet! I'm nuts. Oh well. Time to surf the web. I'm out.

So, to be quite honest, I think that my loneliness is beginning to take its toll on my mood. I've been in a rather crumby mood the past few days and I can't exactly put my finger on it as to why. Maybe its because all I've been doing is studying for the test of my insurance license. That is rather stressful. Or could it be that I haven't even been out on a date for about a year and five months, nor have I seen any possibilities. That is a bit depressing for me... since I am 24 years old... will be 25 in May, and haven't really now that I think of it had a serious relationship, ever. Sure, there were once relationships that I thought were serious at the time, but they either turned out to be a lie or not as serious as I thought. Take your pick. It makes me wonder what is so wrong with me that I can't even seem to get a guy remotely interested in me. Oh there were times in the past year and a half that I thought maybe certain guys that I had met might be a

So here's the thing. What kind of job tells you that you have to pay for something with a credit card? So basically here is the moral of the story :that is stupid. As if it is not enough that in order to work for this company, I have to take this week long class and pass a test in order to get my insurance selling license or whatever... and I have to take some test, but they won't let me pay for it in cash???? They don't accept cash, so you know. What kind of company/school does not take cash? This seems shady to me. So in order to pay for this, I am probably going to have to buy one of those pre-paid american express credit card/travelers check thingies- which costs an extra 15 dollars just to get it, and I have to put at least 300 dollars on THAT and the class only costs just over $200. Arg. Frustration abounds. I had a Choral Society party thingy tonight. It was kinda to get to know people and what not. We played musical bingo which I had never thought of.

So I don't remember if I wrote this or not, but I dyed my hair, and I HATE IT. IT wasn't supposed to look practically crayon red. It has lightened up a little since I did it a few days ago but I really do not like it. It is not as bad as when I accidentally dyed my hair black, but its a close second. It looks nothing like what the color on the box said it was supposed to be. Now I have to wait for a few weeks until I can dye it again, because otherwise my hair will probably look like I put it through a spin cycle. So one might wonder why I may not talk to them as much as I used to. There are a few reasons. Maybe you don't talk to me as much as you used to or you don't show much interest in talking to me when I try to talk to you. Another reason might be that I think I might be bugging you by contacting you. The last reason is that I hate you. Well, not all HATE, but maybe a strong dislike. There are few people that I hate that don't look for Walmart.

So I basically got offered the job at Bankers. However, I do have to pay for a class in order to get my insurance license. That will cost around $200. But if I turn out to be good at this job, I will be making a great deal of money. Also, I could perform with the Grand Rapids opera on weekends. That would ROCK! We'll see. Because if I do get good at this job and make all this money- I will be able to pay off my debt and buy a house! Rock on! Anyhooooooooo.... That's all I have for now.

So, Today. Oh Today. I met a friend's boyfriend (I think). I'm not exactly sure. Usually when you meet a friend's friend or significant other, its somewhat friendly. I could not stand this ignorant buffoon. I wanted to punch him right in the throat. I never want to spend even 5 minutes with him ever again, even if it is to be nice to her. Some of the amazingly ignorant things that he said absolutely amazed me. I can't even believe that some people can actually be that stupid. I got my hair cut today. I'm not sure if i like it yet, but its okay. The lady that cut my hair was really nice. I usually only tip a couple of dollars but I tipped her seven bucks. She made my haircutting experience very nice, which I haven't had in a few years of getting my hair cut. Usually I leave hating my hair because the dumb lady didn't do anything close to what I wanted. Oh well, one thing good about hair- it grows. Tomorrow is my big interview. I'm ne

So the Oscar Nominations came out today. I was okay with them for the most part, except for the fact that The Passion of the Christ got the shaft on some of the areas where I thought there should have at least been a nomination. Just because of "politics" within Hollywood and the fact that all those actors and crap are all big fat liberal communists. Yeah- I said it. I was really upset when I was watching Fox News today and they were talking about making the morning after pill an over-the-counter drug. And the woman who was on there was trying to justify making it legal by saying how difficult it is to take a day off school or work to go to the doctor and get a prescription for it. I wanted to stab her in the face when she said that. Of course not literally, because I don't even know who she is, but you get my point. If a girl can't restrain herself from having sex without being on birth control or taking the necessary measures to make sure she doesn't g

So today I went to H & R Block and got raped for them doing my taxes. What I mean is they charged me way too much! I can't believe that I payed one hundred dollars in order to get my taxes done there. I am supposedly getting my check tomorrow, and if I don't, I'm gonna be seriously pissed. Oh well, the lady was pretty nice. ALSO- What is up with single people getting screwed on their taxes? Unless you are married or have kids, you get screwed with taxes. I got almost half of what I would have gotten if I had any other dependents. It kinda sucks. Oh well, I'm over it now. So there is only a few more days until my job interview and I am still praying that I will get it because I really really really need the job. I was thinking of all the advantages of having this job would be. I would love to get my own apartment so I can decorate it! That would ROCK! I have so many ideas to decorate my own little place. That would be extremely exciting. I would hav

So yeah, I am growing more and more nervous about my upcoming interview on Thursday. What if I say something completely stupid? What if they don't hire me? I'm hoping and praying that I will get this job, even though I'm not quite sure what is included in this job. I do know that they called me based on what they saw in my resume on monster.com. That is a bonus. I am completely scared. I really need a job, and I am scared that if I don't get this one that I won't get an opportunity like this again anytime soon. So I get to be in Nicole's wedding, and talking to her tonight about it was so surreal. I miss hanging with her and I know once she gets married, things will never be the same again. That is how it always is. Marriage changes friendships. How many of my married friends go out of their way to call me and see how things are going? How many of my married friends want me to come and spend a few days with them? Not many that I can think of

WHY IS THIS COMPUTER A PIECE OF CRAP?!!?!???!?!!?!?!?! Why is it that I can go onto any other website but the one I really want!?!?! I have been trying to sign onto hotmail for the past three days and all my computer does is let me sign in and then it goes to "about:blank" for no apparent reason!!! I am about to smash my computer through the window I am sitting in front of and then get a baseball (or softball) bat and smash the thing to death(even though I know it is not alive). I would say "just email me and tell me if you know what is wrong," but I can't access my bloody e-mail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So my computer is a piece of crap. Just thought I'd share that. I'm hoping that tax time will bring me a new computer. That's would be a WONDERFUL thing! Oh, anyway I am so incredibly excited because I have an interview next Thursday. Its with a company called Bankers Life and Casuality. I think I spelled that right... anyway, I am not quite sure what the job is that I am interviewing for because the lady on the phone was talking really fast and I was trying to write it all down, but I am hoping for the best. Since I haven't heard at all from Auto Owner's Insurance. I don't know what that is all about. I'm so pumped because if I get this job I'll actually not have to worry about unemployment anymore AND I can start paying off my serious debt. That would rock the Hiz-ouse. Another reason for excitement is that my man- George W. Bush was inaugurated for his second term of office, and it was a joyous thing. Watching all of the ceremony a

Napoleon Dynamite is funny, but I pretty much hate my life right now.

Wow, this thing will finally let me post new information!!!! I am so excited! Well, for those of you who might actually care enough to be reading this, I NO LONGER WORK AT WALMART!!!! PRAISE THE LORD AM I EVER HAPPY!!! If you might be wondering, I am currently unemployed and I am looking for a job. I am hoping to hear back from an insurance company nearby in Lansing. This would be an awesome opportunity for me to have a wonderful job and pay my student loans and get out of debt! It would be such a blessing and I hope that you will pray hard that I get a call from this company. Besides that I've been looking into some other opportunities and joining the Lakewood Choral Society, which is conducted by my former High School Choir director Dr. Robert Oster. This will get me singing again and I am extremely excited about that, since singing is my life. Also if I get a job in Lansing, I can start taking voice lessons from a Prof. at MSU or something like that. That would be awesome. I wou