So although my life is not perfect, I'm thankful today. I was just reading Holly Grate's blog. I was reading about what happened to their family approximately a year ago, when Josh and Shelly lost their little girl. I can't imagine the kind of grief that they went through. I was reading about how difficult it was for Holly- and I can't even imagine what Josh and Shelly felt.
On a different note, I'm also thankful that it is Friday. This weekend I am going camping with my family for the 26th year in a row. Pretty much my whole extended family goes camping at the same place every year the 2nd weekend of August. I say pretty much, because I do have some cousins who don't go anymore, mostly because they're either in jail or just dumb- or both. And I'm kinda sad that my Uncle Tim isn't going- because I love to hang out with him. We always have so much fun together, which maybe is sad, because maybe he needs to grow up. I don't know, maybe everyone has an uncle like that. I'm just glad I don't have an "Uncle Creepy."
I just have old men that hit on me. Eew.
I am still in shock that Mr. Big came here yesterday, and at everything else that happened after that. I'm not sure what this means, but I'm ... well, to be quite honest, a bit terrified. Not only am I just so freaked out by the fact that he even came here... the guy who gets my address because he says he's going to write me over the summer, and then never does.... then he just shows up and wants to have lunch, and who knows what else? I'm also afraid to let him in again. Last time, my feelings were very strong, and in an act of self-preservation, and by the urging of some friends, I cut ties with him completely- without warning. I just stopped calling him. Now, this was the test: Would he call me? No. He did not. So that was seemingly the answer I needed. He wasn't going to go out of his way to call or write or whatever... so I figured that maybe I was thinking we had something more than we really did... or maybe just I felt for him in a way that he would never feel for me. I don't know.
I think this weekend will be very good for me. I'm going to be getting away from it all... and being able to step away from the situation sometimes helps. Unless it doesn't, of course. Maybe this weekend will be bad because I will have too much time to think about it.
I need to start reading more books. Then at least my mind will be occupied with something else, and maybe I'd have something interesting to write about. I only have 47 books in storage that I haven't read, or even that I could stand to read again.
That would be good for those of you who read the blog too- so you could not get so sick of hearing me talk about my relationship issues- or lack thereof- in some cases. Lately, there hasn't necessarily been a lack thereof. However, for all the guys I've dated in the past 7 months or so, I'd much rather just have that one person. I'm not sure if its Mr. Big or not, but if its not, I'd like to be sure... and end this thing once and for all.
Random pictures of Rasheed... those are mostly just because I love his fabulousness.