WHen one looks at friend's blogs... how depressing should it be that hers is the only link without an "and" in the title? Just me. That's all there is. And lately... it really feels that way. Most of my friends are married and having babies... and I'm here... jobless, single, sad and pathetic. I'm not trying to sound depressed, but maybe I just am.

I have had a string of events lately that have just seemed to go from bad to worse. Financially things are horrible- because I have no job. Romantically, things are tragic- for lack of a less dramatic word. And I don't know that I have ever felt so alone in my entire life. Most of my friends can't understand the way I am feeling right now and what I am going through.

I have been waiting for just one thing to go right lately... just ONE. Something for me to hold on to and say "yes- this is where the good starts," but I am not sure when or if that will happen.

However, last night I felt good about myself. I forgot about my life for a while and went to "prom." We had a "Prom Night" at the place where I sing karaoke. My friend Sarah and I went dress shopping last week (at Salvation Army) and she even bought me this fabulous dress. I will post pics eventually.

Anyway, dressing up always makes me feel good at least about myself. I thought some of those men were going to have their eyes pop out of their head- and more importantly one certain someone who I'm not really making a habit of talking to lately for reasons to be explained probably never (unless you're lucky).

Well, like I said I'll post pictures as soon as I have them. Yes, that's right... I still use 35 mm film. Sorry that I live in the stone age.

Comments

Megan said…
Okay, I'm going to be a little harsh on you so get ready. Get over yourself! God is putting you through a trial right now and instead of looking to Him, you're wallowing in your own self-pity. Are you still able to eat? Do you still have two arms and two legs? Can you use the bathroom by yourself? Can you dress yourself and do you have clothes to wear? Do you have a roof over your head? Do you have a bed to sleep on at night?
There are so many people out there who have it much worse than you and would do anything to be in your shoes. Even if it meant being lonely and unemployed.
Stop believing that marriage and kids would bring you happiness. Marriage is hard and having kids is even harder. People always show the good side to both but they rarely tell you how difficult it really is. They want to beleive in the fantasy they created for themselves when in reality it was a lie. Why do you think there's so much divorce? Why do you think daycares are so popular? Mothers don't want to stay home with their children anymore and be helpers to their husbands- which is what they should be doing.
As for the job, keep looking. Trials aren't supposed to be easy. They wouldn't be trials if they were easy. Your heavenly Father loves you and is trying to teach you something. You WILL NOT get over this season of your life until you learn what it is He wants to show you. The last trial I went through took me two years to get over because I just wouldn't let go. As soon as I did, everything changed. I love you Kristen and I wouldn't be saying these things if I didn't love you. I would also expect the same from you if you saw me in the wrong. Please don't give up. Things will change but you have to be willing to change first.
Todd & Micah said…
I agree with Meg and that's not just because she's my big sis. I was actually about to put something along the same lines till I saw she did it first.

I worry that your missing out on the good things of life because you're so focused on the bad. God cannot bless you unless you're willing to be molded. His plan for your life is bigger than your own. You'll get through this, but you have to be willing to give it to God and trust in Him.

I love you mama chicken :)

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